ason is the least serious minded of all the campaign staff. His sly sense of humor, combined with his approachable personality, make him the go-to hamster whenever social events are held. He'll be the most visible hamster at special gatherings to honor donors and volunteers as well as the more elaborate functions the campaign staff will have to adapt to after the Diddley Squat inauguration. But not for long. His laid-back approach to life will likely be the end of the stiff formality that reigns among Washington's status-conscious elite. In fact, "high society" may be no more in the nation's capital once Mason gets into the mix.

Mason is equally at home with mice, rats, gerbils, beavers and other rodents - even the formidable giant capybara. In fact, a special niche has been carved out for him in the Squat administration - social affairs director. His job will include lots of partying and as well as a little more partying.

Mason loves rock'n'roll music and has already invited Andrew W.K. to perform at the inaugural ball ... well, it won't be a ball, really. It'll be just a regular party, like those usually found in college dormitories on poorly-supervised campuses. The special guests of honor, if Mason has his way, will be the street rats of Washington, D.C. - to whom he proposes a toast to "the only politicians in this city who have never done wrong."