Potus for P.O.T.U.S.
It's official! Potus is running for president!
In accordance with the wishes of the late, great Diddley Squat and Yarash, Junior, the loyal and industrious Hamster For President Campaign Committee spent several weeks this past summer at a quiet retreat, living on austere meals of lab blocks, raw vegetables, occasional fruits, and seeds, all the while debating the choice of a new nominee to run in the presidential race of 2004.
The possibilities were many, each of them honorable and worthy of the office. Indeed, it was not easy to choose from the numerous potential nominees that fit the high standards of the HFP Election Committee: young, wise, intelligent, healthy, even-tempered, honest, and with no attraction whatever to worldly wealth or to that political power-lust that has so hideously corrupted human politics.
But in the end, it seemed that the perfect candidate was right there among the crowd, never thinking himself worthy of the nomination or doing anything to draw attention to himself. Meet the humble Potus, born 17 May 2002 to Jidette and Pacman. This smaller-than-average long-haired hamster has a huge intellect and a gentle, persuasive personality. His extraordinary integrity and solid rodent values make him stand above all possible opponents.
Even young Potus's name suggests that he, above all others, is suited to the presidency of the United States. Traditionally, the the presidential Secret Service speaks of the nation's highest official as "POTUS" (it stands for "President Of The United States"). Thus, the country's most best-known bodyguard agency is already prepared to address their new chief by name.
Does this suggest that Potus has the endorsement of the Secret Service? Unfortunately, everything they do is "secret," as the name implies, so their political preferences cannot be published. However, we are free to tell you that they have been under extreme stress because of haughty, manipulative leaders (of the human persuasion) who stir up trouble and put the lives of their bodyguards in constant danger, and they did express great enthusiasm for having a smaller, nicer, warm-n-fuzzy alternative to the major-party, politics-as-usual types. You can infer from that what you want.
Please feel free to explore the new Hamster For President web page, which is gradually being updated to reflect the image and personality of the next president of the USA, but has surrendered none of its unique history - going back to the first Hamster For President candidate, the unforgettable Mister Ganja.
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